Changing Destiny
by Hiphuggers2
Summary: When all hope seems lost, a vision changes Merlin. He must get back what he had lost. Only rated T because of death.
1. Chapter 1

Hello, this piece was written for my fiction class this previous semester. I hope you all enjoy it. This first chapter has a prologue at the beginning to inform you all (and it was written for my class so that they knew what had just happened) that this is started at the last episode of season 5. Each chapter will be longer. I broke it up because I sometimes get distracted reading long pages of a fanfic and though you probably feel the same way sometimes. I will upload each day (there are only three chapters).

Merlin had tears clinging to his eyelashes as he grasped the grass that lay beneath him. Each hot teardrop that rolled down his cheek was another reminder of his failure; his failure to protect the King of Camelot and friend Arthur, and his failure to achieve his destiny. Arthur had fallen in the battle of Camlann by Mordred, a Druid turned knight. But Mordred should not have been trusted, and Merlin knew. He had seen the prophecies of Mordred killing Arthur but he refused to believe it. Mordred became a knight for Arthur but he turned and Morgana, Arthur's half-sister who was a High Priestess, got to him first. Merlin also failed Morgana long ago. Before, she was so innocent and sweet and they had been friends, but he was a coward. He was too afraid of telling her his secret and helping her. She turned on the former King Uther, her and Arthur's father, and vowed to destroy the Pendragons. In battle Merlin had to kill her with Arthur's sword Excalibur.

He had placed Arthur's body into the boat and sent him out to the Lake of Avalon hours ago but he had no strength left to leave. Freya, the Lady of the Lake, would protect Arthur. Freya was the only girl Merlin ever loved but she was cursed. Because she was cursed people were afraid of her. One night she attacked Camelot and was killed. He held her in his arms while she died. Merlin's thoughts returned to the present. What would the knights think? Percival, Gwaine, Leon, they would all hate and despise him. Poor Gwen, innocent Gwen, left without a husband and left with the new duties as being Queen of Camelot. How could he face them now? Gaius! How could Merlin forget about Gaius? The Court Physician, his mentor and father figure would certainly be upset. Merlin's body was wracked with another bout of tremors. Arthur had finally come to realize what Merlin had done for him after all these years without looking for praise. He found out about Merlin's magic and had thanked him. Thanked him? He deserved no thanks, in fact he deserved to be burned on the pyre. After all the hardships of trying to conceal his magic from others because it was outlawed in Camelot and the heartaches of losing loved ones he was burned out. After what seemed to be hours of mourning by the lake he fell into a fitful sleep.


	2. Chapter 2

Hello, here is chapter 2. It is longer than the first chapter. I hope you enjoy it.

It was not until late afternoon that he woke suddenly, looking around for Arthur then realizing what had come to past. His pale face stuck out from underneath his mop of jet black hair and his once clear, bright blue eyes now dull and lifeless looked out at the lake once more. Heaving a great big sigh he crawled onto all fours and pushed his gangly body into a defeated standing position. He took his first few wobbly steps before gaining his ground and set off towards Camelot where death surely awaited him.

The walk back should take at least three days to reach Camelot, taking into account stopping to sleep for the night, but Merlin did not. He kept walking, unable to stop his feet. A couple times he stumbled but gained his footing and kept going. He seldom stopped for water and did not eat a single piece of food, but he hardly noticed. He knew the dizziness was a sign he needed to eat but he could ignore it again like he had in the past. He made it back to Camelot while the sun reached the horizon, ending the day in an orange-pink glow. He did not make eye contact with the few people out in the courtyard, but instead kept his head hanging. It was all he could muster without falling forward from exhaustion.

Before he knew it he was at the grand steps leading into the castle when he felt someone grab his arms and stop him. At first he thought, _this was it, I'm going to die_ , but these hands were gentler hands; soft, warm and small hands. He knew they belonged to Gwen. He barely moved his head up and saw her standing in front of him with a pleading look on her face. Poor Gwen had not slept much since learning that her husband was missing. It was all Merlin's fault. He looked over her shoulder and found Gaius, his shoulder length white hair blowing softly in the wind; his old wise face solemn.

"Merlin?" Gwen tested as Merlin's eyes shifted in and out of focus several times before landing on her.

Gwen knew that Arthur was gone. Why would Merlin come home without him? But at the same time she was holding on to a glimmer of hope that he would return. Merlin moved his dry mouth, willing it to form words but none came out. He closed his mouth quickly and with eyes watering he shook his head, confirming Gwen's nightmare. Tears formed in Gwen's brown eyes and a whimper escaped her lips as she held Merlin into a tight hug.

Gaius came up and placed a hand on Merlin's shoulder. "I am sorry my Lady. Arthur was like a son to me and losing him will be hard on all of us and his people."

Gwen wiped the tears streaming down her face and Merlin's. "Thank you Gaius. Come Merlin, you need food and rest," she ordered just as Merlin started to sway.

Merlin could only nod his head as he was led away. He was too tired to speak or even to think and before he knew it they were just outside the chambers he shared with Gaius. Gaius bid Gwen goodnight and steered Merlin to his small bedroom. Merlin looked around. Everything was still in the same place he had left it, meaning Gaius had expected him to come back. Merlin carefully eased himself down onto his bed as Gaius left the room. When Gaius came back he held a small cup that Merlin knew instantly was a sleeping remedy. Gaius caught Merlin's eyes looking at it.

"For a much deserved rest," he said simply.

Merlin scoffed. "No, I do not deserve it."

"Don't say that, don't ever say that," Gaius said firmly. "You did everything in your power, now take this."

If Merlin had the energy to argue he still would not have. He held a shaky hand out and grabbed the cup, quickly drowning it in one gulp. He started to feel drowsy at once, whether due to the sleeping tonic or it was the past few days finally catching up to him.

"Goodnight, Gaius."

"Goodnight, Merlin. My boy," Gaius replied as he quietly left the room.

Merlin woke the next day to a warm beam of light shining through his window. It was another normal morning in Camelot. He slowly sat up placing his feet on the ground beside his bed, slowly the memories washed over him. He thought of Arthur, the times they went off into the woods looking for magical creatures, and the many times Arthur shouted at him for his incompetence at being a servant. Suddenly, a blinding pain pierced his skull. He let out a muffled scream as he collapsed onto his pillow and drew his knees up into a fetal position. Images started forming in his head, bright lights, flashes of blonde hair, the crest of Camelot. Merlin subconsciously could feel himself rocking back and forth and tears and sweat mingling together on his face. Then in an instant it was all over. Just a lingering heavy sensation in his head was all that was left. After five minutes or so he slowly sat up, confused and dazed as to what had just happened.

Merlin changed clothes then walked slowly down the stairs and was greeted with the smell of hot soup and bread wafting through the air. He looked over and saw Gaius sitting at the wooden table with a large leather bound book in front of him. He turned his head when he heard Merlin come in.

"Ahh, Merlin I see you're up. I made soup and…. What's wrong?"

Gaius must have noticed his feverish face, Merlin thought. Merlin sat down as Gaius felt his forehead, frowning at the warmth.

"I don't know how to explain. I had some sort of vision. It was painful, like someone was calling out to me but something happened. It sounds crazy I know," Merlin said. "What could it mean?"

Gaius pondered this for a moment. "It could be that you are overwhelmed at the moment, but maybe not. What did you see?"

"I saw bright lights. It was so familiar but I couldn't see it exactly, just whiteness. I also saw the crest of Camelot and blonde hair…." Merlin immediately trailed off, his face paling even more.

"Merlin?"

"Gaius, I think I saw Arthur."

"What? Merlin, you must be mistaken, Arthur is dea…."

"I know that," Merlin said, cutting Gaius off. "But I don't think he actually is. I think he is between two worlds, I mean this world and the after world. But something is wrong. It was as if he was trying to contact me. That it was Arthur trying to ask for help. Something went wrong, death won't allow him. He needs to come back."

"Or it could be a trap. There could still be people wanting to hurt you and Camelot."

"It wasn't a trap it was Arthur and he needs me! He was lost and reaching out with nowhere to go!"

"And how do you know, Merlin?"

They both were quiet for a moment before Gaius broke the silence.

"Eat your soup then we can figure out what to do next."

Every night Merlin started to get these "visions". They were just as painful as the last if not more. They woke him up, he lost his appetite and generally made him upset. He and Gaius had been combing through all the ancient books from visions to death during the day when they had the chance. Nothing popped out until three days of searching Merlin found it. There was a chapter in the dustiest of books that had a spell that could help someone who is between worlds and return them to the living. He could not read the title but could feel the magic rolling off of it, some good and some dark. But it was powerful and Merlin's strength had been waning from lack of sleep and food. He found lately he had to keep tightening his belt.

"Gaius, I think I found it."

Gaius rushed over to the large table where Merlin was sitting. He skimmed over the section and his face grew grave.

"Merlin, this is too powerful, maybe even for you at the moment."

"I can do it. I just need to…."

"No, Merlin. Even a strong sorcerer who is at the peak of fitness could die from this. You barely eat or sleep, you've lost weight and you can barely stand up for more than a few minutes!"

"Gaius, please."

They stared at each other for a few seconds before Gaius gave in. "I am still against it Merlin, but let us talk with Gwen first."

Merlin agreed. They both walked up to her chambers and the guards let them in.

"Merlin, Gaius what is it? What's wrong?"

Gwen was wearing her long deep purple gown and her brown wavy hair was pulled back into a braid. Her eyes were red.

"Nothing my Lady," Gaius replied. "Merlin thinks he has found a way to return Arthur."

Gwen led them over to the large wooden table in the center of the room and the three of them discussed his findings.

"Oh Merlin, I agree with Gaius and I don't think this is the right time."

Merlin turned his eyes down. "I have to Gwen. I at least have to try."

She looked at him sympathetically before nodding her head. "I want to come with you."

Merlin shook his head. "No it would be too dangerous for you. Besides it needs to be performed alone and I need to be concentrate."

"Well, I still think someone should go with you. A knight perhaps, maybe Percival can."

"No, I can manage."

"Merlin, you can't leave. I can't stand to lose two people I care about so soon!" Her eyes started filling with tears.

"I need to, Gwen."

He stood up and left the table.


	3. Chapter 3

The final chapter. I hope you enjoy it. Oh and the spell I use is in Latin with horrible translations from Google Translate. I tried Welsh, but when I translated it back to English it was very different than what I originally wrote in.

After he had spent the past few days in his chambers strategizing with Gaius, and Gwen occasionally popping in to see how the progress was going, he rode his horse back to the Lake of Avalon where he had put Arthur to rest. Merlin knew Gwen was still holding on to hope and did not want to let her down again. Gaius made him practice saying the spell over and over again until he had it memorized. The spell required him to go back to where the deceased, or in this case, Arthur, was laid to rest. He had to wait until a full moon rose before he could perform it. Merlin set up camp next to the Lake and waited for the time to come. It was peaceful. The smell of wet grass was refreshing and the sound of the water on the shore calmed him. Rolling hills stood in the background of the vast Lake which stretched a mile or two. After waiting a couple hours, which felt like an eternity, he took a few deep breaths to ground him, threw his hand out in front of him and recited it.

"Salvum facere a morte vir iste" (save this man from death).

Nothing. "Salvum facere a morte vir iste". Nothing, again. Tears started dripping down his face as he grasped the harsh reality. His strength was fading. That spell took more out of him than he realized. Sobs started to creep out of his throat as he fell down on the shore of the Lake. He laid there overwhelmed in sorrow. He didn't even hear the rippling noise of the water, nor the gentle hand brushing his hair away from his face. He looked up to the sky and saw a familiar face.

"Freya."

She smiled. Her round brown eyes glittered and her dress was still the lavender he remembered as she put her to rest out in in a boat on the Lake of Avalon, just like Arthur. Something was different, though. He could not tell whether she was real or a vision. He noticed she seemed to be too pale, almost translucent.

"Merlin, you must go on."

His voice, rough from crying he replied, "How do I go on?"

"I know what you seek but you must first go to the place where magic is born. There you will find what you are looking for. Then come back here and what you seek will return to you."

Merlin thought this over. The Crystal Cave is where he needed to go. It held the power of all the magic on Earth.

"I miss you Freya."

"And I, you. Now go."

"Are you real?"

Freya smiled calmly at Merlin before she slowly faded away. Merlin opened his eyes and got up. He had a new sense of determination and he would not fail.

Getting to the caves was relatively easy for him. He knew the way but the pull of the magic guided him along when he was unsure. He made it to the mouth of the cave but hesitated. The last time he came in here he had seen the Battle of Camlann and Arthur's downfall in one of the crystals and did not want to see anymore death and destruction. The lush green plants surrounding the large cave was mocking the dark, menacing opening of the cave. The waves of magic rolling out from the cave were knocking into him making it difficult for him to stay standing as he walked inside. It was naturally lit by the faint white glow the crystals emanated and gave the cave walls a blueish glow. All the power swirled around him making him dizzy. He held onto the wall for support but was unable to hold on as he fell sideways. His knees took most of the brunt as he threw his arms out to catch himself. His breathing started to get constricted. He was suffocating.

He drew in deep shaking breaths as he tried to stand but another wave of power pushed him over. A white crystal was next to his head and his head turned towards it as though an invisible hand forced him. Another vision came through the crystal. Arthur was standing in the Great Hall next to Gwen. He stared down at the bundle Gwen was holding and noticed a child. Arthur had a son. The vision quickly went away but lingered in his mind. Merlin felt calm; calmer than he had in months. What the crystals showed him was what will come and he knew this time he would succeed in bringing Arthur back. He was exhausted, although a night's sleep would be beneficial, he decided to take a short nap then leave and get the job done.

When Merlin walked outside he was surprised that it was already morning. The cave seemed to refresh him and he quickly walked to his horse and untied her from the tree. He rode hard and fast back to the lake. He was given the spell in his dream. It was a strange feeling, having information absorb into his head like that but he knew this would be the one. A lady with long brown hair and round brown eyes had whispered it into his ear. It sounded like a wisp of wind gliding through the air, landing peacefully inside his heart. It was Freya, it had to have been. He remembered the voice. It was calming and quiet. She looked the same as she had when she had died, nothing had changed.

Merlin arrived at the Lake in record timing, possibly from him using a spell to slow down time; that always does the trick. He jumped down from his horse and took the reins to guide her away.

"Come on Ilsa, it's not too safe for you to be so close. Come on, let's go over here."

The horse obeyed quietly as Merlin led her to the safety of the trees about one hundred yards back. As soon as she was in a safe position Merlin ran to the shore of the Lake. He gently stepped into the water. The rocks were slippery and he did not want to fall. He went until he was about knee deep before stopping. He closed his eyes remembering the words spoken to him and said them silently and calmly in his mind. This magic was a part of him. Immediately the atmosphere changed. He could feel the magic growing all around him in a whirlwind, the trees swayed gently, the smell of the Earth grew stronger. The magic inside him began to hum. It was powerful magic filling not only himself but filling the trees, the grass, the animals. He wanted to watch but knew he must keep his eyes closed to concentrate. The water began lapping around his knees as the spell was finishing its course. Then, everything stopped. The wind died down, the animals stopped their chattering, and the water began to still. Merlin took a few deep breaths before opening his eyes. He was nervous. Thoughts began running through his mind. _What if I failed?_ Merlin slowly cracked his eyes open, letting them adjust to the bright sun. He looked out towards the lake, nothing. He shook his head _no_ , this cannot be happening again. He started taking quick, shallow breaths, willing for himself to calm down. He slowly turned around but something caught his eye, a flash of silver. It was gone before he knew it. He slowly turned back around. There it was again. He waited with abated breath, trying to see it again, anything again. He closed his eyes praying this was real. He once again slowly opened his eyes and gasped.

"Arthur."


End file.
